From Travel to Sickness and Back..Our journey in 2014

January 2014 will be part of the winter, which Toronto-nians will never forget. Hammered with weather, worthy of “Frozen” Princess Elsa had nothing on this mayhem. 0-43C and a truckload of snow made life miserable. So what did we do ??? Suzanne along with our little minion, Elliot, and myself ventured across and below to San Diego. There, we stayed with my Uncle Des & family. Their penchant for being superbly hospitable and mixing it up with warm weather...aaaah Paradise!!
We forgot winter for those lovely warm days. Mind you, it was a San Diego winter of 21C. Compare that with -43C - hey we will take it!  Alas, all good things must come to an end.  We returned home to the dreaded temperature and conditions.

Moving to April, the night shifts were getting the better of me and my back. Another visit to the Hospital and a shot or morphine does wonders.

Come summer and all is well. The in-law’s visit and I sense relief. Suzanne and myself are finally free to do what we do best…Work some more (Crazies!) Elliot is on his vacation. At this point Elliot is getting pampered by the grandparents to where we seem non-existent. But extra hands made our lives so much easier. I went back to day shifts and loved every moment of it.

We visted Grand Bent, London over one of the weekends. Such a beautiful beach along Lake Huron. Loved every minute of it. Will surely visit again.

Vacation arrived shortly for me and lo and behold, the in-laws wanted to do a trip. Where did we go? VIVE LAS VEGAS, the most “Family UN-friendly” place ever!!

Now that says a lot about the strip. The only children we saw were the ones that stayed in the hotel. They do not call Las Vegas, “Sin City” for nothing, for everything you heard /saw about it true. My In-laws had a blast with the Chinging and chiming of the casinos. Suzanne and  myself tried Blackjack. Overall, I think we had a great time. To top it all, we ate authentic Tacos . How did we know they were authentic ? The place was where the locals ate. Spanish speaking, no-frills and food that had flavor and not just salt. And the cherry on top? we also  found an Indian food joint in a food court, that served a neat Masala Dosa and Channa Masala! (We cannot seem to swerve away from our Indian roots)

 

In addition, we rented a Jeep Compass and headed dare-devilishly into the Grand Canyon. It was definitely a "strike one off" from my bucket list. It was the best /scariest experience ever.  Why scary- My constant fear of running out of gas, and then living the life of Wiley Coyote, going nuts chasing that road runner  (too many Looney T cartoons as a kid)

  On my return, I continued with my favorite pastime, fishing. Need I say more!

 

 

In all of this, Suzanne started a business called Deliciae, which deals with cake decorating supplies. I am a partner in this venture. I get all the assignments with no pay. Felt so much like marriage. The husband has the title but no clout (Just teasing). She has the passion and dedication to see this venture through. I wish her all the very best.

 December arrived and all seem to close up like the end of a carnival. The in-laws left for India. Suzanne and myself shifted gear into reality.  I returned to night shifts. The heat disappeared and it snowed. On December 25, the Grinch came and left us with the monstrous flu that availed our hospitality. Like an unwanted guest, we pray it leaves soon.

Overall, a great year 2014.  We look forward to 2015 where there will be more disses and surprises. But hey, life goes on and every day is a gift from God (some religious funda here!). So without further ado, I wish you and your families a fun-filled, blessed and joyous 2015 !

I am Toddler..Heed my needs !

FOREWORD-  Strange is the power of a toddler. Cute and cuddly as they are, they can also be demonising as Beelzebub. If you watched the 80's horror flick "Gremlins", you will know what I am talking about. Adults, when dealing with them are never sure what to expect. They like something one moment and the next time they throw it away. So Daddy decided to interview  2-year old toddler Elliot and see what light he could shed on this subject. Here is a small excerpt. (True incidents are marked in BLUE)

D. Hi Elliot, thank you for taking the time to chat with me?
E. Hi Daddy...where's my milk ? 
D. Well, I told you it is in the microwave. Lets start.
E. Sure..let's get on with it. It is almost my cereal time.
D. So tell me what make you so special being a toddler
E. Well for starters, we babies get bored of the Goo-gaa days and decide no sooner we learn to walk it is time to move to the next level. Our baby looks and habits (standard with all babies, even though some parents disagree), have got the attention of half, if not, the entire neighborhood and all family members, Grandparents are eating out of our tiny little hands. See how cute they are ? (gives me that cute smile) Where's my milk ???..
D. Should be done. One sec, let me get it for you
E. Hurry !
D. Coming as soon as possible. Here we are.
E. Gulp !
D. I see your appeal as a Toddler has increased two fold.
E. Two-fold?...NO, it is now beyond Oscar status ! People drool at our mere presence. A small wave from us, melts hearts. We are Celebrity all the way and no Papparazzi ...I mean how cool is that. Even Tom Cruise cannot get that privacy.  At the park I spoke to my other babes in strollers and they said that they are already working the system
D. You have a system ? What system ?
E. Oh simple (takes another sip from his bottle...Glurg!) We smile and you bring us what we want.
D. Oh, that's not true.
E. Well who brought me the milk.
D. Yeah OK you win that little one. But do not be fooled by these little victories.
E. Sure, you are right in some regards. But it is mostly the stuff we do not really care for. But if it is something we really want, like a chocolate or another babies toy, we can create one helluva ruckus.
D. Yes, I have seen that happen. But I have never experienced that with you.
E. So mum and you have not spoken about my latest  "grab n no share' cookie of another baby.
D. What???
E. Never mind, it was a minor incident. The cookie never made it to my tummy. Mum was quick to give it back. I spoke to the baby too, and she said she would do the same if the cookie was with me. It is a mutual understanding. But we have to make it look real. The crying from the "lost cookie girl" got the adults apologizing to each other. Hey, we help adults communicate. Mum was not too happy though as we returned from the park earlier that evening.
D. Hmmm..I see. Well, what about diaper changes ?
E. Our favorite subject is Poo and Pee..we not only love doing it, we love playing in it, when no ones watching. Recently, met a fellow toddler at the store who told me that when his parents were not paying his diaper change any attention, he took his pooh and spread it on the walls. When confronted, he simply said, "Painting like Dada". Mama went "Aww" and all was forgotten.
D. That's awful ! I know I have stopped you from playing a few times. But I heard mum missed you for a moment and you made a mess in the bedroom. Poor thing, she had to clean up the mess you created the last time.
E. We like to challenge adults all the time. You think you are big so that you can control us with your mind games. But we have mind games of our own. Ever notice how we Poo and Pee near or during your meal-times or other periods of relaxation? Its all coordinated to keep you on your feet, get you frustrated and bow to our every need. (raises and looks at his milk bottle, now almost empty) Can I have my cereal now ?
D. No lets continue this conver...HEY ELLIOT...DO NOT THROW THAT MILK ON THE CARPET !! Come on, let's get that cereal. We can continue later.
E. Told you, we were Good !



 

Stop Moaning and Start Grooving !

In 2000, I moved to Canada with dreams that were shattered by the reality of life here. My career was being gnawed at even before it started. With so many scruples with life and career, I was ready to packs my bags and do a U-Turn and move to Dubai or Mumbai (if any of them would have me). My wife Suzanne, was patient through these times and provided any motivation to carry on. She even bought a frying pan to hit me on the head should this have gone too far..just kidding..she did buy a frying pan for real ! Then one fateful evening, while sipping a caramel mocha latte at Starbucks at Chapters (now Indigo), Suzanne introduced me to an author I never heard before. His name, Anthony Robbins and the book was "Awaken the Giant Within". From then, it was no stopping me.
 
A long story made short, I have summarised what works for me and in no means is a teaching aid.
 
1. Surround myself with positive company - "Seek and you shall find" I followed this mantra and have a found positive people. They are encouraging always pushing to you do your best. I avoid fruitless conversations like the local gossip, though I must admit sometimes the latter is tempting, but fruitless nonetheless. I too can be a victim of the "misery loves company" jamboree, but tend to move away fast. Now I make a joke of when people ask me how my life is..I just say "miserable". I keep the jealous ones happy and the ones who really do not care happy too.

2. Got my spouse involved - In this case, help is never too far. She is here when I need her support to stay on track. It's with Suzanne's help and confidence that I continue to make/measure my strides.

3. Stay Educated - Books, yes Books ! There is not a question in the world that has not been a addressed in a book. I cheat a bit, by listening to audio books. Time is precious when you have a kid(s), so audio books are a fast track in my craving for knowledge. Do not forget religious texts. There are a plethora of messages and guidance for staying positive. The Holy Bible for me is fantastic source. In addition, I listen to the teachings of Buddhism and lessons from Osho Rajneesh. Great authors, to me, include, Anthony Robbins, Robin Sharma, Sir Richard Branson, Stephen Covey, to name a few. Quotes from the greats like Sir Winston Churchill, Mahatma Gandhi, etc. are inspiring as well. The Internet is also a great source for positive learning. Google has been a trusted guide in this day and age of browsing.

4. NO MORE TOXICON - "Toxicon: is a term I use to denote those individuals that will do their best to ensure that one gets hurt with toxic and destructive remarks. They thrive on emotional blackmail and do all of this with a smile. The "Oh, I never meant to hurt you" comment follows, amongst other things. Trust me, this breed stands out in conversation.  When I come in contact with them, to coin a phrase, I "sleep with one eye open". Something just clicked (An even better idea) - Get them off your Facebook page...LOL !!! .

5. Do not get turned off - "You have changed and are not the person you used to be"- How many times have I heard this one. Yes, I have changed, (over 40 ahem!)  accept it and move on.

6. What will they think ? - I used to worry about this a lot, until recently. Then I questioned, Do they worry about me?...Probably not.  So never mind what people think, you cannot stop them. I do what is best for me. Selfish as it seems, for when I am happy, everybody around me will be happy.

7. Help a person in need - Never let the right hand know what the left hand does. Nough said !

8. TIME OUT - A solitary vacation or even a fishing trip is always on the cards. It helps recharge the batteries. It is also a time to connect spiritually with the Supreme being. You ask questions and you get the answers you are looking for. Works every time. Even time out with your family, just doing nothing..aahhh the life !

8. Keep "Chugging" along-  Yes, no matter what the odds and failures, I look to find a positive spin on or how I can benefit from the failed situation or even what lesson the failure has given me. Staying positive is HARD work, but the journey is fantastic.

I am no self-help guru, but do what is needed of me to benefit my wife, son and my loved ones. I invite you on this journey.

P.S - If you have any tips on staying positive, please share them with me. Any advice is encouraging.

Goodbye 2013 and Welcome 2014 !

I could ponder on the bad that plagued 2013, but I chose to dwell on the good times.

Had the in-laws over and that was amazing. 6-months is a long time, one might say to spend with your in-laws but overall, it was wonderful. They assisted us immensely when it came to Elliot, joked around, did a couple of road-trips to the United States...we could not ask for more. When they left, it was back to square one and that square was way too big for us to get used to all over again.

My folks seem done with Canada, or so it seems. They are up in age and the weather is not to their liking. They lived through the horror of a Canadian winter in 2012.  On the warmer side, they love their beach house in the tiny hamlet of Uttan off Mumbai (yes I called it a hamlet :P). Dad is very active helping out at the local church and mum loves her catering. So they are a busy duo with no end in sight. Kudos to them !

Elliot started Montessori with the usual cries that are a part of almost every child going to school the first time. Gotta give him a  break, he is 2 after all. Elliot loves painting and hates noise. Guess, that gives me reason to shut my vocal cords. He is the best gift we could ever have. Children make your life better, which is the case in our lives. I could go on and on, but I can see you sigh already.

Suzanne got back into the workforce with a great company. She loves it, as where she should rightly be. At the helm of it all, managing her team and result-oriented, as always. I actually get to play bashing board of decisions and ideas that churn in her mind.  After being a project Manager on the book "Call Centres for Dummies" I still say she can run her own consulting firm and come out shining.

Me- I just work nights now and that makes me a social outcast and wannabe vampire (minus the blood sucking antics). In addition to also being a Facebook  buff, I have now become Mahjong lover. I rarely do win, but the thought that I would win at the next board gives me hope. I have started reading again...ok, that is not entirely true...I listen to audiobooks at least once a week. Saves me from fines incurred when taking a book from the library that I never seem to finish on time.

The biggest highlight this year was me flying a plane (a Cessna) on my own... like 75% of the time. Someone has to take control of the take-off and landings. It was a thing to do on my bucket list . Why start on a bucket list, you might ask? Simply because time is fleeting and should I wait any longer I would be too old to do anything. We have a whole world to explore and encounter exciting adventures. Some like the relaxed lifestyle while I prefer the adventure. Next on my list is a scuba dive with a friend, most probably in the United Arab Emirates. Why I choose the U.A.E, well, it has been almost 2 decades since I visited friends and family out there. A dive in the Arabian blue sea, a desert Safari, maybe some fast cars... an adventure vacation is just fascinating ! If all else fails, a trip to Europe is definitely not ruled out.

My 2013 ended on an ill note. I got the flu and it is getting better . As for 2014, like I said , I hope to make it a memorable one, keeping in touch regularly and personally with family and friends. Facebook and other social media does help, but there is nothing better that speaking to someone over the phone or even sending a greeting card/letter. Face it, technology is here to help and not take away the human aspect of a relationship.
Also looking forward to the Football World Cup to be held in Brazil (June 12- Jul 13). Samba music , football and beautiful sites (wink)..now that is my kinda world cup !

On that note, from my family to yours, we wish you a very Happy and Prosperous 2014. We wish that joy surrounds you in every aspect of your life. Keep smiling and remember when you face any hardship, do not ponder, just act on it.

Love you all !

Rohan


 

Keep the Fire Burning !

39years being a son, 10 years of being a husband and now a father, are some of the things I am grateful to the Almighty for. A fulfilled life, to say the least. However, I am home alone, given that everyone is back in Mumbai was a real shocker. Returning from work  to an empty home and none to share you days events, is no party, especially when you are not used to being a loner. Solitary bliss is something I craved for, but not for a period over 3 days. I started to "cold turkey" ! Evil and nasty thoughts started pouring in. Despite reassurances from my now Schizophrenic mind, telling me it was only a matter of time when I would be reunited with my loved ones, the other half-mind drilled me down. The internet was my solace (no surprise here) , but even social media could not salvage my current state.
Yesterday, a phone call from a friend, changed it all. He said that we should meet up. Non-alien as it might seem, it sure was alien to me. I had never gone to any occasion in the last 9 years alone. Nonetheless, long story short, I decided to venture out using public transportation. 
We met downtown by Dundas Square at the "Queen and Beaver Public House". Impressively English, it has a fantastic atmosphere. Rustic to say the least, it had all the makings of a true English Pub. Sitting on the roof patio, we ordered the house special ale (honey-like and smooth) and the house "Pinot grigio". We started with fries and a delicate Curry sauce (a blend of Indian curry paste and ketchup...yummy !). Another friend joined us later accompanied by more Alcohol. Dinner was elegant - Rabbit in Lentils and Monk Fish with a potato pie (of sorts) doused in a creamy white sauce. Typical English fare- A bit bland to an Indian palate, yet nice.



The evening went on with catching up and laughs. We finally wound up in the strangest of places..a bubble tea shop called "Chatime". Great bubble teas and the pearl tapioca (Hindi translation-"Sabudana") was so fresh. It was a great evening. 

It made me think (no affirmation needed here).... YOU NEED FRIENDS - Single, married or otherwise. With friends you bond and indirectly connect with your true self. You need to rekindle the inner fire, we so often forget, that gets dormant, as we age and bogged down with work. Hey, in my case, it was that fire that brought my wife and me together and will also make me a good father. I want to keep that fire burning till the day they drag me out from the "party of life" As Jim Carrey in the movie "The Mask" said "SOMEBODY STOP ME !!
Today, I am off to meet another friend I have not seen in 4 years. Things sure are looking up !. 

Gas and the single home !

The price of Fuel aka Gas aka "Car Juice" is a hot topic in question for every household. The increased prices of car juice is directly proportional to the price increase in commodities. Insignificant as it seems, but there is an increase nonetheless. The bills tantamount to debt and related misery. So what can we do to remedy this menacing reality?

Get rid of our prized cars, mini-vans and convertibles??? Perish the thought! To even think of asking a N. American to give up their car is like asking for their right hand (or left) . To others it might seem ridiculous, but N. Americans are dependent on our 4-wheelers only because, we live away from almost everything including work. 2-Options come to min- A hybrid vehicle (that costs more than a regular vehicle), & Public transit.

Hybrid vehicles- New technologies take ages to develop and conspiracy theorists have deduced hybrid vehicles will never be the norm as long as the oil cartels have their way. In addition, Hybrid Technology is its infancy and the different variations like ethanol, electricity and propane gas (might I also add Water and air), do not have the needed infrastructure for their existence. Even if there is some infrastructure in place, it is at most negligible. So until further notice...Que Sera Sera !

Public Transit- The "Better Way" as Toronto Transit Commission (TTC) calls it. Not limiting ourselves to the latter, Transit in general is time consuming , sometimes unreliable and uncomfortable . It does get you from point A to point B , again the time factor is critical.

Weaving back to our main topic in question aka Gas, these are some general , that we can save on gas

1. Regular Tune-ups - Oil Changes, and regular servicing are are a must for a longer life of a vehicle. My dad once told me " treat a vehicle well and it will return the favor" .
2. Reduce Idle time- Long idling wastes more fuel than restarting an engine.
3. Proper inflation of tires - Use recommended tire pressures (aka psi) as specified on the tires. This truly makes the ride smoother and less strain on the engine.
4. Observe the Speed limit - Did you know that by observing the posted speed limits you can save a lot. Try it ; never mind the dodo who races off from behind you.
5. Close your Windows at High Speeds- When driving on the expressway, we know that you want to feel the wind in your hair. But this causes air-drag and forces the engine to work harder and hence increased fuel consumption for the same speed.
   
6. Plan your trips- Apart from work, try and club your grocery shopping with another errands and do it all in one go.
7. Carpool- I have tried this in the past when I used to work in Mumbai and it worked like a charm. You might be apprehensive at first, but after a couple of trips , it becomes a norm. Carpool with your own colleagues and save the two of you a ton ! Call it friendship building...or hey for those that have an eye for making it teh top, offer to drop the boss to work (just saying ..LOL !!) . For Canada , there is a web-site called http://www.carpool.ca/ or http://www.erideshare.com/

Options for the not so Car crazy...

1. Greens rides- Here I mean Bikes...gosh the evergreen bicycle has been around even before the car. Flex those muscles...and even if you cannot there is the moped..the bicycle on steroids. The moped is immensely popular with commute in Asia and their hot rod versions, the "Auto rickshaws" aka "tuk-tuks", are equally popular. So there you have it options galore.
2. Walking - Need I say more when it means a 10mins walk to the nearest grocery store. Exercise is key.

I have been exploring the points I shared above and the best thing that comes to mind, especially with summer around the corner is the bicycle.

Hope this article shares some light..and adds some relief to your wallet.

Going green !

Bills, Carbon footprint and Global Warming..What do these 3 have in common? No not shoes but $$$$ . Every where you go some one or the other is talking about these and the media is wasting no time in driving these down your alley.

Carbon footprint and global warming...what the heck was that ? When I first heard of carbon footprint, I thought it was something to do with fossils (pardon my geology background) and global warming was made known to me only by Al 'fake-o' Gore.

So lets talk about going green. What can we do to make it not so big a deal? How do we get rid of the bills that make us tear our hair out? How can we reduce our carbon footprint and contribute to not aiding in global warming (if ever there is such a thing)?

To do this , we need to understand the definition of the terms
1. Bills - An itemized list or statement of fees or charges.
2. Carbon Footprint- A carbon footprint is a measure of the impact our activities have on the environment, and in particular climate change. It relates to the amount of greenhouse gases produced in our day-to-day lives through burning fossil fuels for electricity, heating and transportation etc.
The carbon footprint is a measurement of all greenhouse gases we individually produce and has units of tonnes (or kg) of carbon dioxide equivalent.
3. Global Warming- Global warming is the increase in the average temperature of the Earth's near-surface air and oceans since the mid- 20the century and its projected continuation

Now that we armed with definitions, we can proceed to combat these 3 with one single step that has many ...LIVE A SIMPLE LIFE !! A simple life ..what is that? A simple life just means back to basics and giving priority to what really matters for human survival aka Food Shelter and clothing (in Hindi- Roti, Kapada aur Makaan). Sounds so socialist, but then again a blend of socialism with democracy is what made a 3rd world country like India a multi-billion economy with a GDP that only China can match.

However, this is not as easy for us in N. America as the government/ administration does not always practice what they preach. We do live in a capitalist country when the key word is 'Consumerism'. The BS fed about saving and then the media, dictating as to what is right or wrong for us makes it difficult for us humans to make any sound decisions.

Ever wondered why we all have cars, if not just one? Have you noticed that all office building are located in the infamous 'Downtown area'? Affordable housing are located on the city outskirts (almost an hours drive away, if not more) The ever piling bills & taxes encourage both spouses of the family have to work. Who will take care of the kids while the parents are at work? Who will take care of the children's activities ? Who will pay the medical bills ? and what about vacations, phone calls, internet, Blah blah blah! The questions go on and the guilt piles up.

Tackling all 3 is as not difficult as you would imagine. Doing it all at one go with drastic measures is stupidity. One step at a time and it will ease back on you.

In subsequent posts, I shall outlay some ideas on how we can save something, if not a lot. I am working on getting back to basics and paying off everything. Ideas from readers are most acceptable. We need to band together as one community to kill debt which is draining our lives slowly but surely. The height of it all is that we do not even see it!